So, I have to admit that I did not know how long I would be down with my recent computer troubles, so I enlisted some help to get through some of the movie reviews… so I brought in a guest reviewer, and he was not happy. I hope he helps me out in the future, but who knows… HA!

On to the review:
ALIEN ORIGIN from the B-Boys at The Asylum.

Spoiler Alert: this so-called found footage documentary sucks.

First off, let me give props to the editors for attempting to make something out of the cheap footage they had to work with. On with the review.

As an ancient alien enthusiast I probably had more reason than most to watch this flick, and ultimately all the more personal reason to hate it in the end. (By the way, I only made it to the end in order to give it the full review).

As I suspected after the trailer-like intro to the piece, there was going to be no explanation regarding the origin of anything except how the footage came to be recorded by a female documentarian, who for some reason at one point does an impersonation of a reporter for the camera, and her two cameramen while they accompany a small group of soldiers into the jungles of Belize. I won’t even start on how ridiculous these so-called soldiers are – it’s a movie so let’s just roll with it.

Wait, we can’t.

The problem here is that found footage films rely on one basic principle to sell their story: they’re supposedly real. But too quickly does this excuse to cash in on the caught-on-tape craze fall down. The first of the Blair Witch scene-steals has the cameras capturing a “visit” during the night by “something” and we see snippets of the footage, but when the crew wakes up in the morning the cameras that captured that footage have been taken by the “visitor”. The obvious question here is, you guessed it, how are we seeing footage from cameras that were taken away from the crew?

And it continues to go down river from there.

A nice money-saving, but audience-losing, device employed by the producers here was fucking up every single frame with anything alien – or action – in it to the point where it was nothing but dropped frames, glitches, sound effects and noise. Scary? Of course not. Interesting? Not at all. Annoying beyond tolerable levels? Very much so. All the footage of the cast walking and talking is in good shape though, so that’s something.

There is one outstanding thing about this flick: if you’re looking for something on Netflix to fall asleep to this one will put you out fast. Even for a found footage film, this flick is boring. That is all. The end. Cut to black.

—–

Wait!!! Review tack on (just like the film tacks on the last thirty second scene): They finally explain the “origin” of the supposed aliens!!! A producer of the flick must have noticed that nothing had been explained before the end because it’s explained with a b-roll shot of two cast members whose faces we can’t see and two new voices badly recorded in someone’s kitchen dubbed in over top. And the explanation for everything? Well I don’t want to ruin the movie for you.
—–
I guess that says it all, in good conscience, I can’t get behind this one:

If you really ‘got to have it’ though, don’t say I didn’t warn you…you can get it HERE:

Hells yeah! Look at the kick assery of this contest! If you ever wanted to be in a Full Moon movie, then this post is for you… read on for the full deal…the only sucky part is that the sweepstakes is NOT open to Canadians, but all of our American readers should take note!

Win a Role in Our Horror Movie

With almost 300 movies to his name, horror film genius Charles Band is opening the chopping block (casting opportunity) to Fans who want to appear in an upcoming Full Moon Features Horror Movie. Just enter the “Win a Role in Our Horror Movie” Sweepstakes, now accessible from www.facebook.com/zvsfullmoon, www.facebook.com/fullmoonfeatures, and additional websites announced during the event period. The Sweepstakes kicks-off the PPV/VOD release of Full Moon Features’ latest film, Zombies Vs. Strippers, premiering on DirecTV, Verizon, AT&T, Charter, Suddenlink, Mediacom, and other providers on August 7, 2012. Check your video provider’s listings.

Full Moon Features Presents “Win a Role in Our Horror Movie” Sweepstakes
Starts Monday, August 6, 2012 – Ends October 14, 2012
Winners Announced on Halloween 2012

“Connecting with Fans is one of the best parts of making movies,” says master of horror, Charles Band. “We began shooting Puppet Master X in July – and Killjoy Goes to Hell premieres this fall. Fans are already excited for the PPV / VOD release of Zombies Vs. Strippers in August. If fact, there is so much happening with Full Moon this year and we want to show fans how much fun it is making our movies. That’s why we are giving ten lucky winners the chance to appear in one of our upcoming films.”

About Zombies vs. Strippers
Something is taking over Redbox video rentals. It started when the bath salt epidemic brought the “zombie apocalypse” to the forefront of media attention. Now, as the sun goes down over Los Angeles, the walking dead are making a surprise attack. Zombies Vs. Strippers is a fun, comedic horror movie with the perfect blend of “brains” and… you know. The Tough Titty has seen better days and tonight it’s gonna see a whole lot worse. How do Vanilla, Bambi, and Sugar Hills deal with the disaster? The only way strippers can. Blood and brassieres are flying – and fans are gobbling it up.

Directed by: Alex Nicolaou. Starring: Circus-Szalewski (Dead Want Women, Evil Bong), Eve Mauro (Osombie, Sorority Party Massacre), Brittany Gael Vaughn (Hair, Hairspray), and adult star Adriana Sephora.

About Charles Band and Full Moon Features
Fans know Charles Band as the genius behind horror movie franchises Puppet Master, Subspecies, Trancers, Evil Bong, Killjoy, Re-Animator, and more. With almost 300 films in his credits over the past 35 years, Charles Band is a horror-fan icon, always drawing crowds to festivals and fan conventions like Comic-Con… all year round. Full Moon Features’ upcoming release schedule includes a new movie and/or Blu-Ray release every month for the next 20 months.

Zombies Vs. Strippers is now available at Redbox and local video stores everywhere. Watch at home on PPV/VOD, including DirecTV on August 7, 2012. Special Edition DVD available at www.fullmoondirect.com.

Zombieinfo.com and Alliance Films present Paranorman in a sneek peek tomorrow, and the winners have been notified (check your e-mails!). I want to thank everyone who entered, and keep checking here for more giveaways at zombieinfo.com!
Technical crap: We chose the winners by using a Random number generator and the numbers associated with the comments in the post. We used the RNG located at RANDOM.ORG If you didn’t win, it wasn’t your day, but keep checking back for more contests!
Thanks again to Alliance Films!
-ZK

This movie looks awesome, and WE WANT TO SEND YOU TO SEE IT!!!
Alliance Films and Zombieinfo.com have some double passes for this August 8th, at 7:00 pm, showing at the Coliseum Theatre in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada! We also have some Paranorman Art books that will be distributed at random to the Pass winners! (check the twitter feed for a pic!)
Here is how it works- we have opened up posting comments here on Zombieinfo.com, that’s right… you do not have to have an account here anymore! It will ask for an e-mail address, but that’s it! So, leave a comment in THIS POST telling us your favorite animated movie (any kind, not just horror) before August 7th and I will contact you by e-mail to arrange meeting you at the theatre with your pass! EASY! When you arrive, you will draw your own pass… that has a number on it- if your pass matches a certain number… YOU WILL WIN A BOOK AS WELL!

HURRY UP AND ENTER! Passes and seating are limited, so get posting and get the conversation started!!! Please re-post for your friends as well! As always, thanks to Alliance Films for involving us!

First Toblerone…the most sadistic candy bar to ever come out… it’s a JAGGED CHOCOLATE BAR!!! Tears up the roof of your mouth…aside from their hurtful chocolate, and their 1001 use knives and their neutrality, now this? A rift that shoots out bad things? DAMMIT! I knew the Swiss were up to something.

Yeah, we’re boned it seems (again), but hey, should make for a great excuse to eat popcorn! It’s due in August around the 25th so far, so keep an eye out for it!

-ZK